Lesson #1: Don’t run out of heating oil!

It’s snowing…still…again…still…again…take your pick.

As I wrote yesterday’s post the snow continued to fall – big white fluffy chunks.

We wound-up getting about 6 – 8 more inches and it’s falling again this morning.

But we also looked up to see a great big FLASHING 03 on our temperature thingy.

We were out of heating oil - again.

We had actually run out on Friday - New Year’s Day. But because it was the holiday, no one was going to deliver anything until Monday. So our custodian gave us two little jugs of oil to tide us over.

Turns out, 2 little jugs of heating oil lasts 3 days – and that’s only if you make it stretch.

We only turned on the heat for 2 hours in the morning & 2 hours at night.

Wait…I take that back – one night we didn’t even turn it on because the Fire King had made a nice, big roaring fire.

LESSON LEARNED: Schedule the guys to come out & top-off your oil supply around mid-November.

Lesson #2: Don’t run out of firewood!

What was it? Late November when they delivered our 22 bags of firewood?

About a week after it was delivered, the guys came back. They took it all out of the nice, neat little bags, stacked it uncovered up against the kitchen window & took off with the bags.

Well, it’s early January now and we’ve just about burned through all our wood.

Which wouldn’t be such a big problem if we hadn’t run out of heating oil.

LESSON LEARNED: Purchase at least 2, if not 3, orders of firewood.

[this picture intentionally dark]

Lesson #3: Don’t run two space heaters at the same time!

So in the process of trying to make our 2 little jugs last over the holiday weekend while trying not to burn through our dwindling pile of wood – we purchased a second little space heater on Saturday.

We set it up on the other side of the living room so we’d get double-duty from the fire & the heater.

Then, as is our routine…I turned off the heat, went upstairs to climb in bed, turned on our little upstairs space heater, turned on our electric blanket & cuddled-up with Maggie for a good night’s sleep…while Eric stayed up a little while longer before heading up to bed with us.

I would say it was about…oh, I don’t know…midnight maybe…when suddenly I was awakened by loud sounds.

[THUD, THUD, BANG - BANG, CLOMP-CLOMP-CLOMP]

Eric came into the bedroom groping around in the dark – fumbling for the space heater & ripped the cord out of the wall.

We had over-heated our little 110 power converter & it shut everything off.

He headed back downstairs to bang & thud around some more as the lights flickered on, then off…then on again, then off again.

It was no use. We had to leave it off so it could cool down & hopefully reset itself – which it finally did.

LESSON LEARNED: That pungent, rusty smell that fills the house is the wiring trying really hard not to catch the house on fire…not your brand new space heater giving off that first-time used funky smell.

BONUS POINTS: Should you run out of oil & lose power entirely at the same time having a big dog in the bed really helps put out heat.

Lesson #4: Don’t run out of groceries!

Yes, I had sent Eric off to the commissary with a last minute list before the holiday – but it was truly a last minute list, not a full-scale hibernation plan.

But at the time, the snow was just starting up again & being the rookie I am, I figured it would stop soon, the roads would be passable in a day or two & then I could hit the commissary full-steam when I got the car back.

Yeah, not so much.

Don’t get me wrong – technically we’re still ok.

The dog has food. We’ve got lots of rice & beans stocked-up – not to mention canned chicken. But we’re running low on cat food & I’m down to one egg*.

*A story I’ll save for tomorrow.

So all the baking I could do/ know how to do - using the oven to also help heat the house at the same time – is lost.

LESSON LEARNED:Make sure the house is completely stocked to the gills no later than December 20th.

Lesson #5: Don’t expect the snow will stop so you can get the heating oil delivered, order more firewood to be delivered or race to the commissary to stock up on everything you put off till the last minute.

It just doesn’t work that way in Korea.

In Texas, having your air conditioner go out in the middle of the summer is considered an emergency – day or night. And they’ll send someone to fix it right away – you just can’t fool around with 100+ degree weather.

But being out of heating oil in the middle of winter in Korea is not considered an emergency situation.

Stupid, ignorant American-induced situation? Yes….Emergent? Not so much.

So as ironic it as it sounds, we can’t get any heating oil until it heats up enough outside to make the roads passable.

At which point I’ll also be able to order more wood & hit the commissary.

LESSON LEARNED: Don’t be an idiot & try to think ahead more than 2 steps next time.

Class dismissed.

[miss out on the fun?...go back & read part one first, then part two]

Congratulations, Super-Sleuth Cynthia!

Yes, Moo-Moo ate the remote control to the 42″ flat-screen Korean TV that came as a part of our apartment lease package.

And let me tell you, if you thought trying to figure out how to work a TV remote that’s labeled in Korean is hard, it’s nothing compared to figuring out how to go about  replacing it.

If it was an American TV, we would simply go on base & buy a universal remote control & be done with it.

But a mote for a Korean XCanvas TV?…The only English phrase on the whole thing?!

It will need numbers….got it.

It will need the channel up button & the down one….got it.

But will it need to speak Korean?

So we took a $20 gamble & bought a GE universal remote from the BX at Osan.

There were actually a couple of ones to choose from, but we settled on GE because it claimed to support over 300 TV models….and how many different TV makers can there be in the world?

We got it home, ripped up open the packaging & scanned the code list based on the maker name.

Fudge…no XCanvas.

But the instructions said if your model wasn’t listed to hit this combination of buttons & then press the channel up button up to 300 times until the channel actually changes on the TV.

Up to 300 times?!

Fudge. Eric just shook his head. But I had nothing to lose, so I started punching & counting away…

1…nope, 2…nope, 3…nope, 4…nope, 5…nope, 6…nope…

(Crap, this is going to take a while.)

7…nope, 8…nope, 9…nope, 10…nope, 11…no—

HEY, THE CHANNEL CHANGED! SUCCESS!!!

You’ve never seen a grown woman so happy.

Jumping up & down, fists raised in triumph and shouts of ‘whoo-hoo! take that, Baby!’

It’s the little things in life that make me happy.

Life Lesson #4: If you ever need to replace the remote control to a Korean TV, buy a GE universal remote.

I cannot live without a dishwasher.

It’s true – It’s on “the list” of must-have’s when looking for off-base housing.  I’m spoiled that way.

You see, I hate doing dishes. Hate. H-A-T-E. Hate.

I didn’t mind it so much when I was a single girl living the good life in Dallas/Ft Worth. But having another person to dirty dishes in the house can surprisingly make a difference.

One of us rinses off the dishes & puts them in the washer. The other (and I’m not naming names) can tend to forget to rinse off the dishes entirely & totally forget we actually have a dishwasher you can put them in, only to allow them to sit out and dry & harden & cake-on & smell….well, you get the point…making any attempt to handwash them futile. (Love you, Baby)

This is our Korean dishwasher.

Don’t be fooled by it’s English ‘Digital Dishwasher’ name or it’s claims to ‘enhance the value of your life’.

For you see, that’s the only English on the thing.

Janice, our real estate agent extraordinaire, was gracious enough to label 2 of the 6 buttons & 1 of the digital displays.

But I digress…

Let’s turn the thing on, shall we?…Afterall, none of the other buttons work until you turn it on.

Oh look! There’s the power button….see? it says ‘POW-ER’.

Now for the tricky part.

First you have to remember to turn the hot water on.

Then it’s ‘button-button-who’s-got-the-button’ time!

Obviously the ‘start/stop’ labeled button will get things going, but what do the other buttons do?

Small loads? Heavy-duty pots & pans?…Quick rinse?…I have no idea what a fourth button would be.

So I randomly pick a button just to see what comes out. I like to think I’m in Vegas playing blackjack…

Hit me!

So far they all clean, but I can’t help but wonder if one of them would use less electricity than another.

(Our electric bill was atrocious last month. They actually charge us for owning a TV, but that’s a story  for another time.)

So here’s where a little math comes into play.

The dish cycle takes about 112 minutes. But that’s an awful long time to leave the hot water on – burning up our oil bill & electricity bill.

So if you leave the water on a good 30 minutes it will be hot enough to last the entire cycle.

But again, you gotta remember to turn the water off. Which leads me to…

Korean Life Lesson #3: It’s good to run the dishwasher in the morning when you can remember to turn the hot water off after 30 minutes – rather than fall asleep leaving it on all night.

It’s taken a while to get accustomed to the odd little realities of life in Korea – like taking out the trash.

At home you would either set it on the curb (if you owned a house) or walk it to the dumpster (if you’re in an apartment).

Here you load it in the car and drive it to base to throw it away.

(*Notice no more hooptie!…We finally got our car about a week ago.)

Why?…I’m still not exactly certain on that one.

When we first moved in to the rent house I asked Janice about the trash.

She smiled & stumbled a bit over her words – as if she was trying to find a way to brush me off – and said, “Oh, you just take it on base.”

I’m sure I must’ve given her my best “what?” face because she then tried to explain that there were a lof of rules about the trash in Korea & it’s just easier for Americans, like us, to drive our trash on base to throw it away.

Which is what we do – every weekend like clockwork. Which also leads me to life lesson #2…

Korean Life Lesson #2: Never forget to throw out the trash, leaving it to sit in the car on a hot summer day.

One of life’s quirks in Korea is no hot water. Nope, no wonderfully warm water to come rushing out of the faucet the minute you turn it on. No warm water for your bath, to wash your face, do some quick dishes, nada.

Here you have to push a button.

They don’t use hot water heaters – although I’m not exactly sure what the process is called (Jack probably knows). All I know is that it takes oil. Oil we just paid $216 US for last week that’s supposed to last us 6 months.

So in order to take my morning shower I had to walk downstairs & push the little button our real estate agent labeled in English for us. (I don’t know what the other buttons are for – I don’t think she ever told us.) I’m sure they’ll be important come winter because if I remember right this place has heated floors – our only source of heat.

*Mental note: Add that to the list of things to talk to Janice about.

Then it’s walk back upstairs, wait for the water to get warm & climb in the shower.

The problem with this process is remembering to go back downstairs immediately afterward to push that damn little red button. I just noticed (at 2:30pm) that we never turned it off this morning. Crap!

Maybe I should put a sign in the bathroom to remind us, or at the bottom of the stairs.

The irony to all of this is that when we do turn the faucet on & realize there’s hot water coming out of it, we immediately remember we should’ve turned it off before.

Korean Life Lesson #1: Always turn the hot water off.