May
11
2010
Or why you should never blog on little to no sleep
 wrote this at 9:30 pm

[fruit tree fields on the way to Osan]

This past Friday was Military Spouse Appreciation Day.

And it came & went completely unnoticed by the Army, by the base & even by Eric’s unit.

Although I shouldn’t really complain…after all, we go unnoticed all the time.

But after a fairly rough year of sacrificing for the military, I must say I was disappointed.

Ok, bitterly disappointed.

I was going to let it go…just as every other military spouse did…until this morning.

This morning, the culmination of all that pent up frustration & bitter ire came to a head at 0440 (that’s 4:40am for you civies) by way of a phone call.

It was the First Sergeant – informing Eric of an Alert Drill.

Alert Drill: Just as firemen practice putting out fires, policemen practice taking down criminals, soldiers practice grabbing their gear & heading out the door at a moment’s notice…ready to “fight tonight”.

And as I was helping Eric gather up his gear & go, a dawning realization hit me.

“As an Army wife I have…”

And in my head came a flood of odd, random & downright painful things I’ve done.

So if you’ll indulge me, I’d like to take this time to recap it here – sort of a personal call to arms of the military spouse.

[ahem]

As an Army wife I have…

  • Been insulted.
  • Been praised.
  • Been misunderstood when I start talking in “Army Speak”.
  • Received thanks to pass along to my husband for his sacrifice.
  • Hauled 150 lbs of ruck sacks & duffle bags to the car at 0445 while my husband scrambled to get dressed.
  • Modeled 50 lbs of Kevlar so that my husband could correctly position ammo pouches & side armour plating.
  • Been a combatives test dummy for my husband to practice his Army hand-to-hand combat skills.
  • Been awakened numerous times by a phone calls at 0200 usually because some young soldier decided to get drunk & hit somebody.
  • Packed a 3 bedroom house BY MYSELF, loaded it (furniture & all) into a U-Haul trailer & single-handedly unloaded it all again into a storage unit within the span of 18 hours.
  • Unpacked that same 3 bedroom house & put everything back the way it was into the very SAME HOUSE the following weekend.
  • Missed birthdays, Thanksgivings & Christmases with friends & family at home.
  • Come to understand the inner workings of the Apache Longbow AH-D Attack Helicopter.
  • Washed countless loads of sweaty BDUs, DCUs, ACUs…and soon MPUs.
  • Stood at the airport gate & waved goodbye to my husband twice.
  • Been serenaded by a WWII vet in WalMart to the song ‘Soldier Boy’.
  • Helped my husband battle PTSD.
  • Listed & sold our first home by myself.
  • Driven across country 4 times.
  • Learned how to efficiently pack a 2003 Chrysler PT Cruiser to the gills.
  • Completely restocked my kitchen 3 times.
  • Moved 3 times in the span of two years.
  • Hoped a flight to Korea with a dog, a cat & two suitcases to my name.
  • …and contracted some obscure Southeast Asian disease while overseas.

While it’s not a complete list, it’s enough.

That’s enough, right?…Isn’t that enough to get some sort of nod by the folks who profess to be “Family Strong”?

And that’s only the list of a wife who’s been in 5 years now – a wife with no children to explain why Daddy isn’t home.

Don’t get me wrong – I love my husband & would do all that & more again…ahh, scratch that…will do that again (seeing as how we’ve got another 6 years in minimum).

I knowingly chose Army life – eyes wide open & with the understanding it would be a long haul for little respect, little pay & little time to be settled in any one place.

I married for love & took the trials of military life that would come with it.

I married a man who to this day opens my doors, pulls out my chairs & holds my hand.

But Eric got out the door with all his 150 lbs of gear & on time. The dogs finally settled back down & I crashed on the couch hoping to make up for lost sleep.

And as I slowly drifted away…I heard the door open.

It was Eric.

Home again.

No one had remembered to call him (since he is working the swing shift this week) to let him know that the Commander had changed his mind – only the guys on days needed to come in for the Alert.

So what odd, random or painful things have you had to do?

Doesn’t matter if you’re military or not…every wife has her own list.

Check it out! 7 Responses - Whoo Hoo!
  1. Your blog has opened my eyes to the sacrifices of the military wife. Believe me when I say you are not unsung! You are as much a hero as your hubby. I hope my comment finds you headache free. Take care and I’ll check back with you soon.

    Deb

  2. hydrantgirl says:

    I had to giggle at the comment about Eric coming home…. I’ve done the same “hauling equipment, washing filthy clothes, scrubbing smoke out turn-out gear” but nothing like you! I give you “Wife of the Year” award. You’re a very strong woman.

  3. My Lord!I’m exhausted just reading your list! Many people don’t think about the sacrifices of the military wife. You do certainly deserve recognition for the job you do ,so that your husband can do his. I’ve always heard women referred to as “the weaker sex”; Your list just re-enforces my long held opinion that who ever believes that is out of their ever loving mind!YOU GO GIRL!

  4. Tee says:

    After reading this it makes me think you are “Superwoman”.I don’t think anyone knows what a military wife has to go through.I always thought you were a strong lady, this just renforces that. I bought Sondi ’03 PT in ’02 it is now mine(Iam a cheap bastard) It always suprises me what I can put in it. 600sq ft of wood flooring–Afull size electric range –water heater-dishwasher-wood fencing.post and concrete. The only thing that would not fit a full sheet of plywood.It is a hell of a little car–Keep your cool and hang in there.

  5. Sarah (Lowe) Lee says:

    I bow to you!!!! You are my SUPER-hero. The things you deal with on a daily basis are truly amazing. I wish I had your strength and courage. So THANK YOU!!!! Thank you for being there for you husband and your support for him. Because without him my kiddos might not have the freedom we do. So a big THANK YOU to Eric as well. You are both amazing people!!!!!! It is funny I use to find myself looking up to you way back when (ya know since I don’t have a sister)and I am finding myself still looking up to you.
    I know it might not be the same as a thank you from the military but……….

    THANK YOU…..THANK YOU……THANK YOU………THANK YOU……..THANK YOU…….

  6. Terri Barnett says:

    I know you and Eric have made many sacrifices and we all thank you. I have always told you that you are a strong woman. Looking over your list proves it. It seems to be a genetic trait with the women in our family. We might get roughed up from time to time, but you can’t keep us down! Hang in there! We are very proud of you both, and your Poppy would be, too. Love you much!

  7. Jenn says:

    You rock…life is full of interesting things. You have worked your tail end off and received no recognition. But stop and look at the bright side…where you are living and the things you are experiencing would have never happened had you not married that Army man. Have fun and take in everything!!! I love you!!

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