So…that went well…the trip to the vet, that is.

Not.

The regular vet we see, a lovely petite French woman, was not there today. Instead we got the fresh-faced, just-out-of-vet-school Korean girl…who looked visibly frightened the first time she saw Moo.

Really?…This is the dog you’re afraid of?…How could anyone be afraid of that face?

We went through the standard vet exam…‘is she eating ok’, ‘is she peeing ok’, ‘have you noticed any change in her behavior’, on & on.

All the while poking & prodding the ever stoic Maggie Moo. She didn’t flinch. She didn’t budge. Even when the woman started grabbing & squeezing the swollen spots.

And after playing 20 questions with her, she looked at me & pronounced Moo to have “a hormone imbalance”.

{{{{{{ SCREACH }}}}}}}}

Ahh…excuse me?

Yeah. Hormone imbalance. That’s what she said.

[Moo in Texas]

At this point I was trying to figure out how to go about finding the vet we normally see. But managed to get out…‘I’m not sure I understand how that applies’.

So this is where I should probably give you some back story.

Moo-Moo is not the first bullmastiff I’ve owned. And the first breeder I purchased from made sure to impress upon me the fact that you won’t know that a bullmastiff is in pain until it’s too late. Said that I should be very vigilant & watch for any sign of slight personality change – then race to the vet.

Which is what I did the the time my first girl, Boo, acted out of the ordinary. We walked into the emergency after hours vet to a chorus of, “That’s the healthiest dog we’ve seen all day!”

They thought I was crazy. They all had good laughs behind my back. They all pat her head & sweetly said to her ‘There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re just fine, aren’t you’. 

But I persisted & begged them to run a full blood panel on her.

And I was right.

Turns out Boo was in imminent danger of liver failure with levels so high they were off the chart.

Needless to say, they all changed their tune & I was given several apologies.

But back to Moo.

[Moo in Oklahoma]

Through my exchange with the Korean vet she must’ve decided she needed back-up, so off she went to find the Captain on duty.

The second she & the vet tech left the room Moo let out two low whimpers & laid down.

Moo-Moo is NOT a whiner. She has an EXTREMELY high tolerance for pain & to hear her whimper made me both very mad & extremely worried about her.

So back comes the Korean vet with the Captain – a large, overpowering woman with an open book in her hand who proceeded to walk in spouting off her initial opinions of my “boy” without looking at me once.

[playing with the Super's kid in Oklahoma]

I sat there as I listened to her continue, 

“I’ve seen this a lot actually. HE has an asymmetric skin condition as a result of HIS hormones being out of balance. We’ll just run a thyroid panel on HIM & treat HIM with medication.”

Or something to that affect – I can’t remember. I was too busy being stunned by the vet who couldn’t tell a girl dog from a boy dog while she poked & prodded around Moo’s middle.

I eventually corrected her & without missing a beat she proceeded to continue her diagnosis…flipping through the book for photographic examples to show me. And I shared with them that Moo had just whined the minute everyone left – she WAS in pain.

[post pillow destruction]

They continued to poke & prod & poke some more. Nothing.

Stoic Moo didn’t flinch.

Ok…so yeah, m-a-y-b-e…it might be a hormone imbalance – but what about the swelling?

It didn’t add up in my head.

[Moo is NOT a morning dog]

I managed to get them to agree to run a full blood panel on her – which how convenient, can’t be run in-country – and oh yeah, we’ve already missed the day’s shipment. Her bloodwork has to be FedEx’d back to the States.

And as the Captain continued to avoid eye contact with me, I very calmly asked,

“Have you worked with bullmastiffs before?”

Her reply?

“Oh yes. Many times. But I still believe she has a hormone imbalance. We’ve examined both sides, pressed on the swelling & she’s not flinched. She’s obviously not in any pain.”

[ugh]

Ok…so confession time. Have you ever wanted to bolt upright & shout out, “LIAR!”? With the finger-pointing & everything?

I can’t help it. That’s what went through my head when I heard that. If she had really worked with bullmastiffs before, she would know they don’t flinch! Hell, Eric clipped a toe nail too close the other day. It bled profusely & the girl didn’t bat an eye.

This whole appointment was going downhill – fast.

But what else could I do?

I got them to run the blood panel – and that’s the important thing.

And if I’m wrong – Hey, great…I’m wrong & I’ll apologize profusely for my uneducated ignorance.

But if I’m right? And they do nothing?

That’s a risk I’m not willing to take.

So yes, I’ll gladly be the crazy dog lady who is making them jump through hoops just to satisfy my own insanity.

I can’t help it…I seem to be the only one who can tell she’s hurting.

And I love my Moo-Moo.